The Law of 3

How many times have your felt that your patients just are not telling the truth when you hear things like:

“I can’t afford it.”

“I’m too busy.”

“That’s more than I was expecting.”

“I’ll do it next year.”

Whatever the “excuse”, it is rarely the real reason. Most patients, and most people including ourselves, are like a delicious, moist chocolate cake. Upon first inquiry, we will give the “frosting” answer which is the socially acceptable, easy escape route response. But rarely is this response the whole truth. Dig a little deeper and you might get a little more of the truth on the surface of the cake. But by the third inquiry in a different way, you’ll usually hit the tender, moist middle of the “cake” where the truth resides.

It is what I call the Law of 3. It usually take three inquiries (stated in different ways) before you get the real truth. For example, the patient might say:

“I can’t afford that.”

You ask: “You can’t afford it?”

Patient: “It is just more than I was expecting.”

You ask: “It sounds like you’re surprised by some information you were not expecting. Am I right?”

Patient: “Exactly. I thought I was just fine especially since I just went to my previous dentist under a year ago. I am shocked no one has told me this before.”

You ask: “I understand especially knowing how important your health is to you like you said. So based on what you have seen today, what do you want to do.”

Patient: “I need to get started. I’ll just have to figure out a way to make it work.”

Now, it may not go exactly like that because every patient is different, but the point is that the truth rarely comes out at first. It takes patience, empathy and persistence. Hang with them and you eventually hear the truth whether it is after the 3^rd inquiry or beyond.

The Law of 3 has numerous other applications. Here’s two more:

1. Patients don’t really “hear” you until the third repetition. The hygienist expresses concern over something she sees. That’s once. The hygienist expresses the same concern to the doctor when he or she comes into the room. That’s twice. The doctor reinforces the concern by talking to the patient about it in more detail. That’s three. By the time the doctor gets to the third expression, the patient will finally wake up and pay attention! (I know. I am that patient!)

2. Patients may not accept until the third opportunity. Give them a first opportunity to accept and they will :”think about it.” Give them a second opportunity to consider it and they will consider it. Give them a third opportunity and they will accept! Those three opportunities might be in the same visit or subsequent visits. You don’t have to be pushy or overly aggressive when you know that the Law of 3 is always at work. Just hang in there.

So give your patients a second and third chance in every area. Don’t give up on them so fast! They’ll get with the program if you will just stay with the program! Remember the Law of 3. You’ll usually get the truth, understanding, and acceptance by the third time around!